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Who Needs Patience?
(Prepared for Grades 3-5)

Purpose: By the end of this lesson, I want my students to be motivated to be more patient.      

Teacher Hints

#1: Think of how either patience or impatience has helped or hurt you. Reflect on how patience or impatience has helped/hurt your friends, family and associates.  Would any of these personal examples make the lesson more personal to your students? 
#2: Think of how to follow through in the coming days and weeks to help internalize this lesson. Perhaps when a student shows impatience by turning in a paper before looking it over, or scurrying to the front of the line to beat others, you could say, "Hold on Heather!" to remind them of this lesson. 
#3: Some of your students may not know what "surfing" is. You may want to find a clip of surfers on www.youtube.com or a picture to let them see people surfing. 

Introduction: Defining Patience

Today we want to talk about patience. Who can tell me what patience is? (Get several responses, putting the elements of patience on the board as they share them. Come up with a working definition, such as "waiting calmly.")

Story Time! Hyper Heather Learns Patience

Preparation: (Put students in a setting most conducive to story-telling and sharing. Write on one side of the board, "Hurry up, Heather!" and on the other side of the board, "Hold on, Heather!" Have them say each phrase together as a class. Even those who can't read will soon understand what to say when you point to each side. This should help to keep them involved with the story.) 

Today I want to tell you the story of a girl named Heather. Heather lived near Malibu Beach in sunny California.  She had blonde hair, blue eyes, lots of energy, but no patience at all. 

I suppose it all started when Heather was young. You see, her parents were always in a hurry. They would say,   

"Hurry Up Heather! Get dressed so we can go shopping!"

"Finish up your food! Come on, hurry up Heather! We don't have all day!"

"Walk faster! Hurry up, Heather! We can't miss the neighbor's party!"

"The waves are up! Hurry up Heather! Throw on your swim suit and get your surfboard!" 

So Heather became good at doing things fast. She was first to turn in her homework. First in the lunch line. First to raise her hand with the right answer. And first in her neighborhood to catch the waves when the surf was up. 

And Heather really liked being first. She liked the teacher's smile when she turned in an assignment early, her coach's pat on the back when she got to practice first, her parents' approval when she got ready before her sister. 

And this seventh-grade year at Malibu Middle School, she desperately wanted her two biggest firsts ever - the "Best Writer Award" for the school newspaper and the "Top Athlete Award" for the Soccer Team. 

But one day, two things made her wonder if she'd ever win. 

It started when Barb, her newspaper editor, pulled Heather into her office and said, "Heather, you're great at turning in your articles ahead of schedule, but you need to be more patient and look them over first. Sometimes you forget to put your name on them. Other times you misspell words because you don't take time to look them up. It's like you're always thinking, 'Hurry up, Heather!' when you should be thinking, 'Hold on, Heather!'"  

After school her soccer coach, Antonio, pulled her aside in practice and said, "Heather, it's great to be the first to get the ball. But you can't just kick it at the goal right when you get it. You've got to be patient and wait for the right shot."

The next day, Heather ate lunch alone in the courtyard. She didn't get it. All her life she thought that fast was best. Now fast was getting her into trouble. How could she ever get those awards if her coach and editor didn't think she was the best? 

She said out loud, "How does anyone know when to go fast and when to be patient and take longer?"  

"Heather, why don't you slow down enough to listen to others?" said a familiar voice. It was Amy, her best friend. 

"What do you mean?" asked Heather.

"When I'm visiting you at home, all I ever hear your parents say is 'Hurry up, Heather!' Seems to me that you need people to remind you to slow down. What if you tell a couple of your friends and teachers to remind you when you need to be more patient. They could say...let's see...what about..."Hold on, Heather!"

"That's exactly what my newspaper editor said!"

Heather thought about that through about five tater tots and a fish stick. Then she said, "You know how much I want those awards. Will you help me Amy?"

"Sure! Isn't that what friends are for?"

So for the next month, Amy would say, "Hold on, Heather!" whenever she rushed too fast. Heather's teachers would say, "Hold on, Heather!" when she tried to beat people to the head of the line. She discovered that waiting her turn made people like her more. 

Her newspaper editor would say, "Hold on, Heather!" when she needed to look over her work before turning it in. 

At the end of the school year, Heather didn't receive first prize. But she did receive awards for second place in writing and third place in soccer. And that was fine with her. It was enough to know that she'd given her best and that she was learning and growing. And if she could just be patient, maybe she could get first place next year. 

One summer day, Heather and Amy were walking on the beach with their surfboards, waiting for the waves to get bigger. Heather said, "You know Amy, life is a lot like surfboarding. You can't just take any old wave that comes along. Instead, you patiently wait for a good wave, or even a great wave, then you ride it with all you've got."

Discussion

1. What did Heather want more than anything?
2. What was keeping Heather from getting it? What tape was playing over and over in her mind? (Hurry up, Heather!)
3. Why is patience important?
4. How did Heather start to learn patience? How did she have to change the tape that was playing over in her mind? (Sometimes, she needed to hear, "Hold on Heather!")
5. If I tell you this week, "Hold on Heather!" what do you think I will mean? (You could change it to "Hold on Harry!" for guys.)

GAME: It Takes Patience to Unravel Life

Divide into groups of 6 (must be an even number). Stand facing one another in a circle.  Instruct each student to grab the right hand of a student across from (not next to) him or her. Next, join left hands with a different person.  Then, try to untangle (form an unbroken circle) without anyone letting go. After a group finishes, let that group assist another group that’s still struggling. If they do well with groups of 6, let them try groups of 8. Reward everyone for their patience with some wrapped candy.

Debriefing:

1 - In what way did it take patience to complete this task?
2 - What kept some of you going when you were frustrated and tempted to give up? (Examples: You didn’t want to let others down. Others were encouraging you. Outsiders came to your aid.)
3 - In what other areas of life is patience required? (Examples: Completing assignments for a difficult class. Practicing a sport when you’re tired. Doing chores at home.)
4 - What are some ways we can be more patient rather than give up too early? (Examples: Work as a team instead of individually. Get outside assistance. Look at the eventual reward more than the pain of getting there.)

Patience in Real Life

We've seen patience in a story and in a game. You told me how it can work in real life. (You might want to share here what you've learned about patience in your life.) Now let me tell you about it worked for some pretty famous people.  Before I tell you the names, try to guess who these people were who needed patience. 

You see, most people who succeed have to patiently wade through many failures. 

Conclusion

Today and this week, notice when you're getting discouraged and ready to give up. Whether it's in a class or a sport or at home, remember how patience can pay off, even after years of defeat. Hang in there! Success may be just around the corner. 

Copyright January, 2008 by Steve Miller and Legacy Educational Resources
( www.character-education.info ). All rights reserved. Can be copied and used within schools who have a membership.